How to develop inter-personal skills

All of us love to be the kind of person who is loved by all. But how many ever become successful in getting the love of people?

There are certain inter personal skills that distinguish people. These can be divided into six different traits.

Trait no. 1 – Friendliness

How many different masks do you wear? How long can you fake? At one moment or the other, what you are trying to hide from everybody will get exposed. Don’t fake. Remove your mask. Be yourself. You will be happy. In a while you will find yourself surrounded by people who enjoy your company and those whom you are more comfortable with.

Who doesn’t want to be cared? How much you care for the other always counts. People who care for their fellow beings are always loved.

When was the last time you had asked a kid, “Who do you love more, mom or dad?” The habit of ranking people starts right there.  Being friendly requires you to develop one more skill – i.e. You should learn to respect others. Ranking take away the element of respect from your mind.  It’s not just your boss or you who deserve to be respected. People even from the lowest strata of the society deserve to be respected.

What do you know about service mentality? You love to serviced. I love to be serviced too. You don’t go to a restaurant or a store that provides poor service. Service makes a difference too. Then why not follow the same in your everyday life too?

Trait no. 2 – Practical service

Someone asks you to do something. He communicated 75% of that, you understood just 75% of what was communicated. This drops the effectiveness of the communication to 56%. (You understood only 56% of what was intended to be communicated to you). So how much will you deliver? Definitely less than 56% of what the job requirement was. So what can you do? Sit and be sorry? Or play the blame game? Never J You can always make sure that what you understood is what he had intended to tell. Just clarify J

Suppose in the above context, you were the communicator who communicated a work to someone else. What should you do? Simply probe. Ask questions to understand if the person had understood what you have tried to convey J simple J

Trait no.3 – Ability to do the right things at the right time

People don’t have time to waste for others. Nobody has enough time to wait for someone every time. Nor do they have time to ponder over vague information. Timeliness and accuracy matter too. Ability to do the right things at the right time and to pass on the right information to the right people at the right time is important in relationships too.

Trait no. 4 – Team work

Developing an ability to work in teams is important. Team games help a lot in streamlining your thoughts to the good of the whole team than satisfying individual egos. Never think that you are the most important person in the team. I had told earlier in this article that ranking people is not good. Believe in your team members, create positive vibes within the team, avoid interference in responsibilities and create win – win conditions.

If you win, it is because of your team. If you lose, take ownership of the act.

Trait no. 5 – Ability to resolve conflicts

Conflicts occur between people, even though the reason may change from situation to situation. Understanding of both, the people and the situation is equally important in resolving conflicts. Adopt win –win strategy to resolve conflicts.

Trait no. 6 – Reciprocal accountability

This is one trait that rarely anybody is aware of or most of the people overlook. You are accountable to each and every other person you interact with. Do you wish to have a boss who is accountable to you? Everybody who meets you expects you to be accountable too. Accept your mistakes and take responsibility of your actions.